“Do you realize everyone coming for lunch on Shabbat has either a Masters degree or in medical school except for me?” I asked Ari while he was brushing his teeth last night.
“Yes, that’s true. But if it makes you feel better, you have more jobs than anyone combined!”
I do have a lot going on these days: giving tours at the Museum of the American Gangster (on St. Marks! Come visit! Get a Groupon!), working at QED for another few weeks, Trivia on Tuesday night, babysitting and now walking dogs for Wag. I downloaded the app last week but didn’t start until yesterday. I was walking to the library and got a ping on my phone that a dog needed walking ASAP within .4 miles and like a pretty mild superhero – I was there!
I hadn’t walked any dogs before (and may have embellished my dog experience on my resume) so I was a bit nervous but I HAD gone to the mandatory orientation in DUMBO so I thought, how hard could it be?
I walked up to the apartment and knocked. A large man opened the door enough to just show his face. He looked me up and down.
“You’re here to walk Max? Let me get him ready.” He shut the door in my face.
Five minutes go by and I’m wondering how long it could take to put a leash on a dang dog. My mind started entertaining crazy things like hey, maybe it’ll be a dude in a dog costume on a leash like that one scene in Preacher that I don’t fully understand.
But no! The man finally returned with just the most GIGANTIC dog I’ve ever seen. A pit bull that immediately started jumping on me, slightly nipping at me. He handed me the dog’s leash/rope while I laughed like ‘haha oh a BEAR! That’s cool! I walk monsters all the time! Here we go, this dog weighs as much as I do! Off we go, dog from Sandlot!’
It half-dragged me downstairs and I held on with both hands like a cartoon. I started to get the hang of it as we walked down Amsterdam and I noticed almost immediately how people started getting out of my way. While this Pit looked pretty vicious he was actually just an energetic sweetie! It was such a rush, walking down the street with this massive dog – tiny dogs scrambled to their owners, sketchy teens on the corner gave me a wide berth. guys hanging outside the corner store pressed against the wall. I felt like some sort of powerful demigod. Run tiny dogs! Flee scared old women!
Since yesterday I’ve walked a few pups and while they’re all so sweet (and strong!) dogs are EXHAUSTING. They’re all jumping and walking and crying when you leave. It’s nice to come back to my kitty who sleeps, curls up on me, sleeps, eats and sleeps some more.
Bittersweetly, I won’t be at these jobs much longer. Ari and I went down to Baltimore last week and we’ve decided to move down there for a year, check it out. We visited the improv theater (BIG) and I was able to talk to some people about comedy there. I love to perform and I love living in the city – there’s no reason why I need to live in *the* most expensive one.