So yesterday was pretty exciting. Which was why I was too tired to blog last night. Which doesn’t make any sense because instead of writing about the interesting things that happen, I blog about my trips to Starbucks. But yesterday was legit.
First, let me say that I’ve been spending a LOT of time in my car driving around all day and night and I have developed this obsession with 93.1, the country music station here. And now I know like a dozen pop-country songs by heart and I’m noticing a pattern. Many many of the female sung songs are about no-good boyfriends, cheatin’ lyin’ etc. and many of the male country singer’s songs go something like this: “I like my truck.” I know that’s not like a new concept – it’s just funny to see how even today so much of country is like “I like living in the South.” That’s the whole song! Just about how much people like living in Tennessee. Also, an unsettling thing I’ve noticed is that many country songs refer to ladies butts as “sugar-shakers.” Not even from a “THAT’S OBJECTIFYING!” point, from like are the butts the sugar? Are the pants the shaker? These are the questions that keep me up all night!
Anyways, yesterday at work I casually brought up that I thought that the weird hemp store I wandered into on Monday would be a cool business profile story and the fashion editor liked it! I might even be able to take my own photos. So now I get to go back to this store and be like “Do you remember me..? Well, I’m still not paying $68 for a tank-top but can I take pictures of you selling them to richer people than me?” I’ll keep you posted about that.
Also yesterday was a nice blast-from-the-past feeling when I locked myself out of my apartment on my way to networking event my friend Shira invited me to. It’s for young professional Jewish ladies and I wasn’t feeling very professional sitting on my front stoop angrily berating myself for paying more attention to what granola bar I was gonna grab on my way out than whether i had my keys. Sitting in front of my residence without keys is like the story of my life, when I lived in Commons at the University of Maryland I had to rent the spare key so many times they filed me under “frequent loser” status and made me pay 50 bucks. Rude. But this story ends with me wiki-howing using a credit card to open my lock via iPhone and it worked! I was so surprised! I thought using a credit card was a movie-myth like turning on the TV right when relevant news broadcasts start and people affording apartments in NY even though they’re waiters. I felt so proud and also really really unsafe.
So I finally made it to this Professional Ladies thing on this really cute rooftop bar in DC. It was about a dozen women standing around drinking the free water (it’s a good thing I was driving because I probably would’ve ordered some tequila – 9-2 jobs are hard ya’all). It was a little awkward since the space was small and when you finished talking to someone you’d say like “well, it was nice to meet you…” and then move 6 inches over to a different conversation. Which is what happened when I was talking to this woman who said she wrote policies for an organization to end domestic abuse and I’m like “Shouldn’t there just be the one policy? No more domestic abuse?” and she’s like “Uh…kind of…”
My friend Shira was talking to this woman when she called me over and introduced me to her saying, ” Aviva, this is Dana she’s a stand-up comedian and I think you should meet because YOU should be a stand-up comedian!” which, one is really nice and doesn’t put someone on the spot at all. Especially because I’m sure to someone professional, hearing that anyone funny can be a comedian isn’t annoying at all. Or at least, that’s what I would think but this girl was SO nice (and not at all competitively funny like a lot of comedians i know are) and she was saying hard it is to be a female comedian, that it’s such a boys club, that there’s a lot to deal with. Which OBVIOUSLY made it sound so fun, right? Like, if i was trying to convince someone to be a journalist I wouldn’t say like “Sometimes people hang up on you!” “It’s so fun, one time some Glen Burnie hick told me to get off his lawn!” “Just do it!”But stand-up is definitely something on my bucket-list so maybe when I’m like 45 I’ll give it a whirl at my retirement home (in my fantasies, anything after 30 is old age homes).
SORRY I didn’t put any pictures in this post. I’ll find one now.